Saturday, June 23, 2007

To Be or Not To Be?

I'm standing in the 'family planning' section of the drugstore the other day trying to figure out which of the 1000 pregnancy tests that I wanted to trust with my sanity. Do I go with the one with the two lines, the plus sign, a digital readout? Brand name or generic? 1, 2 or 3 pack? I picked up the First Response 3 pack.

Yesterday morning, I get up and go and pee on the stupid stick and wait. Ok, the first line comes up immediately. The second one is sort of there, but not totally. What the hell does that mean? Either you're pregnant or you're not, right? Its not like I can be just a little pregnant...

I drag my husband out of bed. He groggily says he has no idea and we turn to the Internet. This is no help. Other than the millions of post on message boards from other women who have experience similar readings, I can't find an authoritative response I'm satisfied with.

I go off to work, fully expecting to be able to wait until at least after work to do something about it. By 10:00, I've failed miserably at putting this out of my mind and I go out to the store in search of a 'clearer' response.

Back in the aisle again, I know just what I'm looking for - the one with the damned digital readout that says pregnant or not pregnant. No half-truths there. It even tells you when its ready to tell you the result. I go back to the office and settle into the bathroom stall to try and pee on the stupid stick again - exponentially more difficult in public.

After a minute it proudly blinks the response: pregnant.